Wanna go halfsies? I do.

So here's a fun little story:

As you can imagine, college students don't exactly rush to the gym on Friday afternoons (well, except for this lean-mean-academic-machine!).  They have...other things to do...  Anyways, last Friday I went to the gym after my last class and and I was joined by oh, twenty or so other students.  Needless to say, it was pretty quiet in there and really I couldn't help but overhear this one conversation:

Dude 1: Hey bro, how's it going?
Dude 2: Oh hey man.  It's good.  It's good.  Pumping iron, getting big, you know.
Dude 1: For sure.  I am just so ready for the weekend, I am going out and partying hard because after this, I have got to hit the books for the semester.
Dude 2: Definitely.  Are you graduating in the spring?

(Ok here comes the crucial part of the conversation, get ready!)

Dude 1: Maybe, maybe not.  I don't know if I'm really feeling this whole job-search situation.  Plus, I figure another semester or two here and I might meet someone.  A couple years from now I'll have settle down, get married, and share half my shit with some girl, so I figure I should start looking now.
Dude 2: Oh yeah, I got you, bro.

Ummmmmm what?  Ok, a few things:
1. That man was not your brother but yeah, you were both totally bro...
2. Hmmm, not really feeling the unemployment thing?  You and the rest of America.
3. On whose dime are you going to school on?  If you're willing to pay for an extra semester or two to avoid looking for a job and increase your odds of finding a girlfriend, can I have some money because you obviously have some extra.
4. Oh silly girl who agrees to marry/share with you.  Silly, silly girl.  Not that I've got a plethora of relationship knowledge in the bank but I'm pretty sure I'm not going out on a limb when I say you're idea of a relationship is a bit skewed.


The things one hears on a college campus...

One more random thing: The other day I spilled about half a bag of mixed frozen berries onto the floor.  Being a college student, the best available clean up tool was a broom.  When I was done, the floor looked like someone had tried to murder one of the Fruit of the Loom guys.  It was "berry" messy - har.har.har.

Sweet Dreams

Most of my posts are the result of thoughts that swirl in my head for a few days, all with a common theme, that I eventually organize into one (somewhat) cohesive entry.  This one has been working its way through my brain waves for months now though. 

I like my baby blanket.  I like my bunny, Fluffy.  I have also come to the conclusion that there is nothing wrong with the fact that I am twenty years old and I would rather sleep with both my Blanky and Fluffy than without them.  Even if that makes me the world's biggest loser...

Look at how cute they are they are!

The blanket was actually my sister's.  My mom cannot remember who made it for her but whoever it was did a darn good job.  Blanky will soon be 25 years old and it has held up exceptionally well.  There is one corner where the crocheted loop is bigger than any other but that is because when I was little I constantly held that loop with one finger tucked tightly around it.  Awww, I know, how sweet.  Everyone picture little Maura - I probably have "hot budge" sauce on my face from ice cream, my hair is a mess and I just might be missing my two front teeth from an incident involving the YMCA pool and a trip to the dentist...

Now picture me crying.  Why?  Because I have three siblings, whom I love dearly, but also sometimes want to kill.  Meghan has just threatened to take Blanky back because technically it's hers, she had it first.  Heck no, Indian-giver!  Kevin has probably just referred to Fluffy as "Lumpy" which is terribly offensive since she can't help that years of wear and tear have left her inner batting less than fluffy.  And Colin?  Well, as the baby of the family, he probably drooled on one of them or something.  

Despite my sibling-induced struggles with Fluffy and Blanky, they've always been faithful companions.  Coming on family vacations despite my deep fear of leaving one of them behind all alone in a hotel room.  Fluffy made journeys to various summer camps secretly stuffed in the bottom of my pillowcase - I'm sure you all did something similar!  And finally, they joined me at college...until the beginning of this semester, when I decided to try and "grow up" and be without them.

Guess what people - I  did grow up without them.  I realized that sleeping with a small crocheted blanket wrapped around my feet or a lumpy stuffed animal in the crook of my elbow does not make me a child.  Who cares what people think about my pastel Blanky and pink Fluffy bunny.  I like them.  I can do without them just fine, but I like them.  And that is just fine, even if I am a mature adult.  If you don't like it, too bad - just don't call her Lumpy!

So, what was your childhood security item?  Is it still around?  Is it secretly stuffed at the bottom of your pillowcase or displayed proudly on your bed?  I am fond of a little blanket and a pink bunny - and I could careless if the entire blogosphere knew this fact!   

Scaredy-Cat

"meow" goes the scaredy-cat.

Guess what world, I have a comedy-buddy. His name is Chris and together we are working our way through a book called The Comedy Bible. One of the first activities in the book was about dealing with fear. We were instructed to write down five things we would have done that very day if fear had not held us back.

Although I am afraid of all you readers knowing my fears and evilly using them against me, I am working on conquering fear, so here we go. In no particular order, five things I would have done last Monday had fear not held me back:

1. Shaved my head - I have always wanted to shave my head. When your own mother suggests a rather expensive smoothing treatment for your hair, you know you have a major problem with frizz and getting rid of my hair is a much less expensive solution than a keratin treatment. Plus, do you know how hot one's head becomes in the middle of summer due to a full head of hair? Oh the convenience of a clean-shaven head... Still, I am afraid. Afraid of what my friends and family would think and of course, what judgments would strangers make if they saw me?

2. Spoken up more in class - Yeah, this is kind of a lame one but it was one of my fears. I am afraid of saying something wrong that would make me look like an idiot in front of a whole classroom of my peers. I am also a little afraid of being right and then looking like a know-it-all freak. Either way, everyone hates me and I become "that girl." Are my fears irrational and a bit exaggerated, yes. Do they still exist, yes.

3. Asked someone one out - Do you want to know who I would have asked out? Really? You want to know? Ok, his name is....HA like I would actually tell you! I think most people have a fear of rejection and I fall into this group. Plus, I am a girl, so shouldn't he ask me? I know, I know, that's a stereotype - but I don't care.

4. Danced everywhere - Ok, this was when I was beginning to be reluctant about sharing my fears. But I do think that if I was not afraid of what other people thought about me I would dance more, maybe not as I made my way to class down College Ave, but perhaps I would put some extra pep in my step wherever I went.

5. Held a tarantula - This one came about from my fear of most things creepy-crawly. Most creepy-crawlies in my life are spiders, aside from the occasional cockroach in college dormrooms, and they get the brunt of this fear. Anything that can crawl up a wall and defy gravity just does not seem completely benign to me. Plus, they could crawl in my mouth or ear when I am sleeping and lay eggs - I've seen something similar on "Medical Mysteries" so it's definitely a legitimate fear...

Then The Comedy Bible told me I needed to conquer one of those fears. Ummm excuse me? Really not fair that you did not inform me of this until after I wrote my fears down. Should I have seen this coming, certainly, but I did not think "the bible" would be out to get me! Well what do you know, my friend Anne knows someone who recently got a pet tarantula. I prefer pet puppies, but that's just me. To each his own...

So sometime in the near future I will be holding a tarantula. If it gets all huffy and decides to jettison hair at me (that's how they attack) I will be holding/chucking-as -far-as-possible a tarantula in the near future.

Conquering fear is good though. It's healthy, right? It instills confidence and self-worth. At least that's what I am telling myself every time I think about my fears. Fake it 'til you make it. Confidence is key. Just a couple antidotes to get you through your fears, people. I have found that hitting "Publish Post" is like slaying a big ol' dragon of fear whenever I put a new post up. Take that fear of judgment, you are outta here!

So what are your fears? How are you going to conquer them? Would you like to go on a date with me where we hold hands tarantulas, go out to dinner dancing, and at the end of the evening, I just might let you kiss me good night shave my head!

"RAWR!" goes the confident-cat.